This morning was day 5 of my cycle. That means that it is day 1 of my second round of clomid. Thinking about taking clomid again was really what got me thinking about starting this blog. Taking that medicine threw my body completely off track physically and emotionally and I became aware of it just in time to start the next round....yay! *sarcasm* So I figured I would journal about it for round 2.
I am a pretty up-beat, strong, and determined individual but this stuff had me crying like a baby at the drop of a hat. My confidence was gone. And I almost quit my job about 6 times. I hated it.
So why am I going through it all over again?
Because I want to have a child. If this is what it is going to take to get there, then I am all for it.
Of course my husband and I have discussed how far we are willing to go to become parents to a biological child. We have our limits set...they may be ever-evolving...but we have them.
Let me back up some more and give you a bit more of our story. Yesterday I told you when we started trying and the events that led up to it. I had mixed emotions about the process. See, I come from a huge family. My mom is 1 of 8, my dad is 1 of 6, and I am the oldest of 4 successful pregnancies (unfortunately my parents had to cope with 2 unsuccessful pregnancies). We did the math recently that my grandmother on my dad's side had 19 grandchildren and 26....yes you read that correctly....26 great-grandchildren! Reproducing is in our genes! But I have always had a little voice in the back of my head saying, "my luck will have me unable to conceive." Ugh, self-fulfilling prophesy?! So when it didn't happen right away, I struggled. My husband just told me that we didn't have relations enough and that was it. I did my best but still nothing.
Like I have mentioned before, my husband is a researcher. He does it for a career and for the fun of it. So of course he started researching stats on conception, reproduction, and anything else remotely related. He discovered that on average it can take about a year to conceive so he wasn't all that worried. I had started using an app called "My Days" to help me keep track of my period and when we were having relations but it wasn't until about 7 months of being unsuccessful that I convinced my husband that we needed to step up our game. I wanted to try using ovulation sticks to make sure I was ovulating when the app said I should be. I'm glad we did because my cycle has not been totally reliable since going off the pill and it turns that that I usually ovulate about 2 days after the app says I am scheduled to ovulate.
A bit of advice, if you have been trying for any period of time with no success, I suggest you try ovulation sticks to make sure you know if you are ovulating and if you are ovulating...then also when it happens in your cycle. We use the Clear Blue tests and have found that they are pretty good. We have used the basic ones as well as the more advanced and are happy with both sets of results.
I have a tendency to be long winded so I'm going to end my story for now. But I will be back tomorrow with more of our journey and updates on how the clomid is treating my system this time around. ~ Ms Infertile
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